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Wit and Wisdom for a One Party State

A handbook for government by wishful thinking

Wednesday, June 02, 2004

Press Conference

At a press conference, President George W. Bush fielded an unexpected question.

"Mr President, Bob Novak writes in his latest column that you have an IQ of 60. Could you comment please?"

"Bob Novak never said that."

"But it's written in his column. I have a copy of it right here."

"Oh. Well, 60 is a pretty good number. It's over a majority of intelligence. I'd say that's passing."

"But Mr President, the IQ of the average person is 100. Someone with an IQ of 60 will have trouble dressing themselves, let alone commanding the most powerful nation on the planet."

"Oh. Well, if you say so. But you mark my words: Bob Novak is making this story up. There is no foundation for this. It is all, just, well, it's impossible, that's all."

"Impossible, Mr President? Why do you say 'impossible'?"

"Well, it has to be impossible, dammit. After that Valerie Plame thing, Karl promised me that he wouldn't leak any more of our classified information."

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